A drunk was driving through town, weaving violently all over the road, when a cop finally pulled him over.

"Where have you been?" asked the cop.

"At the pub," slurred the drunk.

"Well, it looks to me like you've had quite a few," the cop snapped.

"I guess I did," said the drunk with a smirk.

"Are you aware that your wife fell out of the car a few intersections back?" the cop asked sternly.

"Thank goodness," sighed the drunk. "I thought I had gone deaf!"